


Coax the cold out of me

by remusmoonyblack-lupin (moonlightgalleon)



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Lie Low At Lupin's, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-14
Updated: 2016-07-14
Packaged: 2018-07-23 23:17:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,112
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7483881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonlightgalleon/pseuds/remusmoonyblack-lupin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The famous Lie Low at Lupin's trope.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Coax the cold out of me

_“Sirius will be staying at yours for sometime.”_

That’s all. Eight words from Dumbledore. That’s all. That old coot wrote those stupid words and thought it would be enough to calm him down. Remus had not seen Sirius since _that night_  and now, that bastard thought it was fine to ask Sirius stay at his place. And what made Dumbledore think that his place might be safe? It was a shabby flat, with some bare furniture and a bed. The only redeeming fact about his building was its huge basement,  which he used when his usual transformation spot was unavailable.

Breathing deeply, Remus forced himself to keep the upsurge of thoughts and feelings tucked into a box in his mind. He would allow himself to look back at that later, not when he felt as though he’d rather be flayed open than confront his long lost best friend. He went for a shower, hoping, in vain, that he could wash those sentiments down the drain. He dressed in some muggle clothes and plonked himself on his couch for a quick nap. He was still recovering from the full moon yesterday.

Remus gasped as he jumped awake. His brain was still foggy and he could not fathom what woke him up. The sky outside was dark and he wondered how much he had slept when he heard that sound again. Everything came back crashing to him. _Sirius._ He would be here, probably was already judging from the sounds of pans rattling in the kitchen.

_Time for that Gryffindor courage Lupin._

It did not make it any easier though. Sirius, _his Sirius,_ was standing there, cooking like a muggle like he used to when they shared a flat together. Azkaban had taken its toll on the other man, but he looked like the Sirius Black who thought it funny to dye a Slytherin’s hair red and gold, who became an illegal animagus at fifteen for his werewolf best friend, who loved so fiercely that it hurt, who was the godfather of their best mate’s son. The longing stares, flirtatious smiles, lingering touches, the unpleasant gut feelings when one of them came back to the dorms after a snog, everything was coming back. They had been dancing around each other since fifth year and things never went further than flirting and pining from afar. Even when they lived together after Hogwarts, neither of them did anything. Those fears of damaging their friendships seemed so small now. They had just gone through worse and they were still fine. Remus did not know how much time he spent watching him until Sirius turned and almost jumped when he noticed him.

“Fuck! Re…” Remus felt his heart aching at the old nickname.

“Sirius…Padfoot” And as though that name was his cue, Sirius rushed forward and his thin arms were wrapped around Remus so tightly that he thought his ribs might crack. And yet, he could not find it in himself to pull away, he only held on more firmly.

He felt his throat going tight and his eyes hot when he noticed the wet spot on his shoulder. Like that, it was as if all his thoughts about dealing with the situation with a rational mind were gone, he clung onto Sirius, crying. Crying for the past fourteen years. Something he had not allowed himself to do since that night of Halloween.

“I am so sorry…So sorry Sirius. I should have known…you would never…I don’t deserve it…please..forgi-” Remus begged as Sirius manoeuvred them onto the couch. Even though he was taller, Remus managed to wrap himself around Sirius like they used to back then, his tears felt like they would never stop.

“Re…Moons don’t. I gave you every reason not to. I am…I…I asked James to make that..rat the secret keeper. He kept asking for you…I..fuck..I am so sorry as well”

Remus was shaking his head and pleading to some god out there to stop his tears. He heard Sirius crying as well, taking sharp and shallow intakes of breaths. They stayed like that the whole night. Neither knew when either of them fell asleep.

***

The next month happened quickly. They were still working on living with each other after all this time. Sirius was looking better now. His cheeks were not as hollowed, he had cut his hair and it was not as matted as before. Sirius still had that haunted look in his eyes sometimes, but those moments happened more and more rarely now. They both slept on Remus’ bed and still had nightmares sometimes. Sirius most often. He never talked about them, but he always woke with a gasp and tearstreaked cheeks. Remus would comfort him, his arms holding the smaller man.

Sirius was not recovered enough to accompany Remus for his next full moon. Even though the black haired man insisted to be with Remus as Padfoot for his transformation, they even had a shouting match about it but Remus was stern on this. He left that evening for a hut in a plain nearby, Sirius angry but still helping him as much as he could. That transformation was as hard as the past ones. The wolf was angry but at least it no longer expected his pack. The next morning Remus woke in his bed. He did not feel as bad as before, his ribs were sore but did not feel broken anymore. Even his bruises were healed.

He was still trying to get into a sitting position when Sirius came back with a cup of tea. He no longer looked furious, just had a worried expression on his face. He gave Remus his cup and settled next to him.

Neither said anything until Remus felt a small hand cupping his cheek. Grey eyes met his.

“You know among the things I regretted the most while I was in…while I was there was that I never told you how I feel.”

“And what would that be?” Remus asked. He wanted to be absolutely sure. His heart was threatening to beat out of his chest, his stomach constantly doing somersaults.

“That I fucking love you. Have done since first year. Since you entered that compartment and told me my name was a colour”

Letting out a watery laugh, Remus pulled Sirius into a kiss. He pressed their foreheads together when they pulled away.

“I love you too, so fucking much. So please, please let’s be better this time. No more secrets.”

Sirius nodded, and tucked his face into Remus’ neck, breathing that familiar smell in. “No more secrets this time.”


End file.
